Organising an Online Market - Part 2

Well, my last blog ended with a bit of a freaked out "eek", at the thought of our online jewellery market actually happening. But what next?

Never having actually organised a market, I'm fairly sure there are steps to take between getting people interested in participating, and the event itself (dum de dum de dum, whistle, drumming fingers...). Ooh I know what that might be - having those people interested actually confirm their place.

Yes, this is where it could all come unstuck.  What the hell did so many people ask for information for?  The information itself wasn't that tricky... then name of the market "Just Jewellery" kind of gave it away (didn't it?).  Were they looking for kid's clothes? Homewares? What exactly is the freaking problem with sending back a confirmation?  Just so you know, for all of you at home who are silly enough to try this, this part is definitely harder than getting expressions of interest!

So far, several legitimate questions, several questions where the answer is in the info, and several rounds of photos sent for products that can't be included because they're not jewellery (also in the info).  And I'm not having a go at anyone, because none of you are alone! (And I will admit, although very quietly as we don't want to think I'm a complete and utter nong, to having to re-read the info I sent out just in case I didn't mention certain things, and also I couldn't remember what I did or didn't say myself).

Despite a lot  of shouts and posts about confirming places, at the date of writing this, we are one biz short.  Yes, 19 out of about 40 odd interested have bothered to confirm. I'd dearly love to know why the others didn't (feel free to comment if you're reading this).

*Interlude of 2 weeks where we play interlude music ♫ ♪ ♫

I cannot believe we are still one short!!!!  If I have to change the very pretty advertising banner that I've made now (I used my interlude music time wisely), to read "19 fantastic jewellery bizzes" then I'm going to be pretty ticked off.  And seriously... 19? Doesn't have the same powerful ring to it as 20, does it?

On the plus side, some of the wonderful 19 have started sending in their photos and descriptions for the market - wow!  There are some really, really (and one more) really wonderful pieces.  I find it fascinating to see how other people's imagination manifests itself, even for those of us who don't necessarily make everything ourselves.  Why do we go in the direction we've gone? What makes us love those pieces and not others?  I guess that's jewellery for you - as individual as our tastes are to wear something, there's someone out there who can make you happy in supplying it!

*More interlude music while we wait for magical number 20 to arrive ♪ ♫ ♫ ♪ . In the meantime, I'm off to learn how survey monkey works... I really hope I don't need a monkey to work it though.

PS - The second lot of think music worked!  Number 20 is now with us, places are locked in Eddie, and the Just Jewellery Market is ready to go.
PPS - Many thanks to the mysterious and elusive Number 20, who not only has beautiful jewellery, but a great sense of humour too... love your work!

Organising an Online Market - Part 1

Anyone who has been on Facebook for more than five and a half seconds has seen an online market.  Many of us who have business pages have been asked to participate in an online market - and done so.

It's great - someone sends you a list of rules like how many photos you can include, the date you need to get them to the organiser by, and then asks you to share a few goodies from the other pages to advertise the market.  Pretty easy stuff.

As the hour of the market approaches your heart beats a little faster in anticipation of the sales you're about to get, the tv gets turned off (or at least put on mute!) so you can concentrate on business, and you flex your fingers so your super fast typing skills will impress a potential customer and of course make the difference in getting a sale.

The reality is often quite different.

There are goods from every area imaginable, and a few services thrown in to the mix as well.  It takes you 15 minutes to even find your own stuff (and you know what it looks like) - and there you are, photo numbers 463 to 468.  Not surprisingly, many potential customers either lose interest before they scroll that far, or have spent their money on something from the first 462 items up for grabs.

And what have you gained from your participation?  Often not that much, except you missed out on your favourite tv show and now have super flexy typing fingers.  Although flexy fingers when you make jewellery is a pretty good thing to have gained, you probably didn't need to join a market to get them.

I started to think how a market that suited me would work, and came up with a list.

1/ Jewellery only.  I would have a far greater chance of selling jewellery if the only items in the market were jewellery.  This would mean that people who checked it out were looking to buy jewellery, rather than chasing up an oh so cute softie or teeny tiny pink dress with the sweetest little applique on it that you ever saw.

2/ There is no 2.  Really, my only criteria for what would suit me best was a jewellery specific market.

So I sat and waited for someone to organise one.  And waited... and waited... and HELLO???? ORGANISERS OF MARKETS - waiting!!  For 4 months I waited.

Then the little voice inside my head said "why don't you organise it yourself then?".  Which was quickly shouted down by the big voice of reason and why-take-a-risk-like-that, that said "are you mad?".

Lists, that's what I needed - lists.  I actually have pretty good organisational skills, and us organised types have lists.  We like lists.  We like the making of them when we put our thoughts down in some kind of order, and we absolutely love crossing things off them because we know we've accomplished something.  If a list maker is having a slow day they'll write things like "make coffee" on their list, just for the sheer pleasure of being able to cross it off again once the aroma of caffeine fills the room.

The first thing needed on my list is what I would like to gain from such a market.  Obviously the joy of using my organisational skills for everyone's benefit except my own wasn't going to be enough, there needed to be a business advantage in there somewhere. Gaining fans for the MinzBeadz
Facebook page, fans that really liked the page, was the first.  Gaining new customers, or potential customers was the second.  Making sales during the market was the third.

What were the negatives though?  The big voice of reason and why-take-a-risk-like-that said I might completely stuff it up and look like a total fool.  As in a beetroot red, never show my face in public again foolish.  As in I might be the only person in my online market kind of foolish.  That one went on the negative side of my list.

So I told the big voice of reason and why-take-a-risk-like-that to shut up.  (You should hear the inner dialogue some days!  Honestly, I just wish for some peace and quiet), got on with making a pretty little pic to post on Facebook asking for expressions of interest, and held my breath.  Good thing the first EOI came back in about 5 minutes, because I was starting to black out!

All up, in only a matter of days, 30 lovely jewellery people showed interest, and a few more trickled in over the next week or so. Fantastic! The market is going to happen! Woo Hoo!

Oh shit! The market is going to happen! 

Clay Play - Jewellery 101

Determined not to leave my lovely new packet of clay sitting for too long and building up to an anxiety attack over starting something, I jumped right in.  After 2 weeks.  However, being a reasonably intelligent person, I was determined to go in prepared and not have a situation similar to the glue ooze happen.

So, tools required - something to roll, smoosh, press, work the clay on.  I swear I used to have this lovely thick PVC sheet for pastry - where the hell has that gone? Hmm, as I can't actually recall the last year I made pastry, I've probably chucked the sheet out.  So, plan B - baking paper. Check.

Something to cut with - this might require two cutting implements.  Something to cut a chunk (technical term, try and keep up with me people) off the block of clay, and something to use for some finer detail.  We've got loads of old knives in the third drawer in the kitchen (it might be the second or bottom drawer in your house, but you know the drawer I mean).

Okay, apparently we have no knives whatsoever in the third drawer - clearly left home with the PVC pastry sheet.  As the entire contents of the third drawer are now spread over the kitchen table, I'm quickly assessing and rejecting possible implements, at the same time wondering whether I'll get away with using the good knives...  No, naughty! Do not use the good knives!  So I settle on an old cake server for the cut-the-chunk-off-the-block tool.  Although I am wondering why I still have the old cake server if I no longer make pastry.

Now, being a plan ahead sort of person, I've already sussed that I'll need a hole pokey thing to make holes in the pendant I'm planning, in order to attach a jump ring and chain later on. As I was hanging onto a broken piece of memory wire for something, I feel entirely like this was the reason.

The perfect clay jewellery tools

 Plastic wrap - even without reading instructions, I've figured out that air dry clay is going to dry out just as much in a big block as a little jewellery sized piece and some wrapping will be required.  And drat 'him who hates the cling film box' as he's tossed it out and I have to struggle with cutting off a sheet of plastic wrap without wearing it.  (Although it might keep the clay off my clothes, which could be a good thing).  I'm planning on neat and tidy, but I've discovered that's not usually the case when I start a project!

I'm ready! So exciting! Cut a chunk (cake server works well) - not too big, not too small, press, roll.  And did you notice earlier what wasn't done... well catch up now. Forgot the knife for the detail work didn't we hey? (Yes, I'm including you in the blame.  You didn't notice earlier, so don't say you did).  Quick, what to use - bloody cake server's useless.  Really, is it too much to ask that it doubles as a scalpel?  It's not like it's being overworked on cakes.  Scissors are cutting implements, scissors will cut clay.  Hah! Not that exact, but I have sandpaper, she'll be right.

I also have a lid from a tablet bottle to hand (i.e. the glue ooze catcher), so that will work just like a scone cutter... or not.  Take note: unlike a scone cutter, there is another side to the cap and you can't poke your clay scone out.  You shake it.. then jump up and down with it for a while.  Then you resort to pushing it (because of course pushing it further into the lid will help!), then you turn your back on it and sneak a peek over your shoulder just in case it's too shy to drop out while someone's watching.

So, I cut/hack/chop/chunk away, I press/roll/smoosh away - it's like playdough... so much fun, and I get to call it work.  So my first clay pendants are cut, holes are poked (the hole pokey wire worked beautifully), and now we wait for it to dry.  Then some sanding and painting (I'm just going for a painted design on these first ones).  And lastly there will be something to make it shine over the top. I'm not actually sure what that might be at this stage (I never said my planning included how to finish this), but it can't be too hard to work out.

Perfect (haha) wet clay pieces

In the meantime, I'm just going to go and play, er, work, with the clay again.  Anyone got a playdough machine?  The one where it all comes out in long squiggly bits?  Can I borrow it?







Some days later...
So much for just painting. Truthfully, I can't draw. I know I come across as being a completely accomplished artist in many areas, so this will probably come as a shock to you. So the nice round pendant is a little thicker than it started because it's got about 20 coats of paint on it from painting over my woeful art, but that just makes it stronger.  The two large triangles broke when I picked them up - you can apparently roll clay too thin. Who knew?

However, the whole point of this was to learn, and I've learned heaps - what not to do, and what will work well next time. So in the end I decorated my lovely round pendant (the others are still waiting for inspiration) - dragonfly, hand coiled wire flower and a pretty purple crystal heart. I'm going with the theory that purple improves the look of any jewellery! It looks great on.  And when I wear it absolutely no one is going to stare closely enough at my boobal area to see the little imperfections! (The imperfections of the pendant, not my boobs).

My perfectly imperfect clay pendant!

What do you think for my first attempt - pass or fail?  (PS - I've just bought some actual clay tools, I think the cake server can retire to the third drawer and wait for a cake again).

2012 in a Nutshell

It's been a while between posts - and I'm sure you've all missed my witty ramblings (or missed laughing at me bumping my head) in the interim.  This blog was going to be a cleverly drafted  sales pitch for Christmas, rich in Google loving keywords and search engine friendly tags.

But I missed the boat.

Why did I miss the boat you might ask (I just know you wanted to ask that)?  Well, I'll tell you.  It was because I was actually too busy selling jewellery and other pretty beaded things that I had no time to spare for a blog. Consequently, you will be pleased to hear that this blog is now not going to try to sell you a single thing (unless you're interested, in which case click the link somewhere on this page to go to the website...).  Instead, a brief summary of the year that was 2012 - the first full year of business for MinzBeadz - from the MinzBeadz viewpoint.

(I actually started this as a month by month thing, which quickly fell into disarray - you'll just have to pretend the months are in there somewhere. There's only 12 of them, you can manage!).

I've taken at least 10,000 photographs of various beads, charms and jewellery - as only 525 are currently available on the website (and you'll have to take into account a random 100 items that have sold out and can't be seen anymore), you'd think I'd have it down pat by now. I'd love to say I do, but certain things continue to defeat me.  I'm sure a photographer would know exactly what to do to make pale pink and pale purple show up as something resembling the real colour, but I still don't.  And there are a few where if you look closely you can almost see my reflection - but hey - up until now you probably haven't looked that closely.  I'm hoping for defective memories in you all too, so next time you visit my humble store you will have forgotten to look for me in the pictures.  (But if you remember - I'm waving at you, so wave back).

I've sworn at Facebook approximately three and a half million times and invented a few new strings of swear words that make no sense, but feel very satisfying to say to my computer screen.

I've most recently lost my blog posts 'behind the scenes' and Mr Google decided that I no longer existed, despite the fact I'm fairly sure I do - although first thing in the morning there's this weird old lady looking out of the mirror at me which is kind of freaky.  (For those of you who read my Facebook posts, you might recall that a certain government department also decided my name wasn't really my name, despite the fact it is - conspiracy? I think so).  As you might have guessed - the blog issue is now sorted, or I would be yelling this instead of typing.  I wonder if I typed everything in capital letters whether I wouldn't need to publish the blog...

I've seen my sales grow from a single one in the first month of business, a single one in the second month of business, to, well, LOTS pre Christmas 2012.  Despite the fact that a business should actually make a profit at some stage, I can't tell you how exciting it is to open your emails and have orders fill the inbox instead of requests to help out some poor African woman whose husband has died and left her so many millions she just doesn't know how to keep them. (I think this woman might have won an email lottery or two to get the millions - how lucky can you get really!)

It is also quite exciting to not stare at a computer for 2 months with nothing much happening except the occasional swear word with "facebook" thrown in the middle of the sentence.

I've had a few tussles with the business end of the website, with the result that having international shipping options readily available, or even the facility for direct deposit, enables you to bypass clicking an option for postage!  Now that's clever - if I had knitted my website from the beginning like I wanted to, my pattern would have included a row for postage charges and another for direct deposit.  These tech people aren't as smart as they think they are when a simple K1 P2 and a couple of cable stitches would have done the trick.

Facebook, while aggravating at times, is a great way for small businesses like mine to market themselves and their goods.  Like any microcosm of society, people are people and you get all sorts.  I've come across some really horrible human beings, who think they're clever but if they were, well they'd be doing their own thing instead of copying other people's and trying to get any type of information you have worked hard for, for their own uses.  It can be fun though, to give just a hint of misinformation and watch them use it! Not that I would do that of course, but I've heard of it happening (picture angelic look - and I thought the weird lady in the morning mirror was freaky...)

At the other end of the spectrum are the wonderful people who give freely of their time and expertise, occasionally products, and operate at all times in a very helpful way to someone like me just starting out.  A really big thumbs up in particular to Kim from Fairy-Licious & Goblin-grunge, Linda from OzFeathers, various members of Flying Solo, Susan from Bookmark Corner, Robyn from The Horse Stall and Jacqui from Mark My Words Trademark Services, who have gone above and beyond. If the generosity shown by these businesses to someone who isn't spending any money with them is this great, I can only imagine the type of service you might receive if you were a client or customer of theirs.

Earlier this year I expanded into making some basic jewellery.  I've now dropped and picked up (or lost forever in some cases), beads and crimps and bits of chain and god knows what else nearly every day for a number of months now.  You'd think finding a bright pink bead on a limewashed colour floor would be relatively simple - think again. They apparently all carry a cloak of invisibility which they throw over themselves on the way to the floor - and they think it's funny, because occasionally I hear them snickering from their little invisible mouths.

Hopefully 2013 will see my skills start to catch up to my ideas, and some fabulous bling will result!

Hopefully 2013 will also my ability to hang on to a bead and not drop it improve too.

During 2012 I managed to work out how to do one thing in PhotoShop (yes, one - not a typo).  I'm reasonably cluey (not brilliant, just reasonably cluey) when it comes to using computers and different programmes.  Except PhotoShop. It's like they've got this great programme and they don't trust us mere mortals with it. What do they think we're going to do with it - run naked down the street shouting "I get PhotoShop!"?  Oh... yes, hmmm I see where they're coming from now.  But it was only that one time, and it was a very short street really.

And so much reading this year.  Sometimes I think if I read another marketing article, or how to improve your SEO or SEM rank I might scream.  (Oooh, look at that - how to make page one of Google by tomorrow morning.  And why are these people spouting this stuff never on page one?).

And the title of this blog relates to the fact I've munched my way through a tonne of pistachios this year. They make a great late night snack (full of vitamin E, anti-oxidants, ... who am I kidding? They're so yummy I can't stop!) to keep up your strength for swearing about Facebook, or good comfort food when the beads snicker behind your back or the freaky lady is watching me.

So that's my year in a pistachio nutshell.  My very best wishes to you all for a happy and safe Christmas season, and hope to see you back here in 2013.

My Memory Wire Has Amnesia

After the traumatic experience of losing all except one of my precious jump rings on the floor (which a lovely reader referred to, very aptly, as "the black hole"), I thought I'd try my hand at a memory wire bracelet.

How I imagined my new bracelet would look

Memory wire is so called because it remembers its original shape, and will always revert to that shape.  You can purchase memory wire for rings, bracelets and necklaces, generally in coils but sometimes as a complete piece with a clasp already attached. 

You can imagine, to a novice artist, that this has a lot of appeal - hell, most of it's done and I only have to get a really lovely combination of beads and bits on the wire to end up with a beautiful piece of jewellery.  So I bought my memory wire bracelets (multicoloured wire, just because I could, and it seemed more artistic somehow than plain old grey), and a pleasing variety of beads.

So not only did a memory wire bracelet sound like a relatively simple project, it also seemed like one of the smarter pieces of jewellery that you can buy. Best of all though, I felt like the possibility of it following the jump rings into who-knows-where was fairly remote.

I started off full of enthusiasm.  It didn't last long.

These lovely little bracelets have a connector (trust me when I tell you that connectors will be featuring in a future blog!) that screws one side of the bracelet to the other - obviously so you can get the bracelet on and off without dislocating your thumb.  Suppliers think of everything really.  Under the side of the screw connector, with the hole for the screw, is a crimp bead (fairly self explanatory - it gets crimped onto the end of the wire to prevent everything sliding off when the bracelet is undone), and the other has the screw piece sticking out.  "Screw piece" would be one of those technical jewellery terms I use now I'm an artist.

So I uncrimped the bead (that only took an hour or so - I think Hercules had crimped it) and prepared to thread my gorgeous beads on, in an artistically pleasing way.

Hmmm, forgot to suss out the hole size in the beads versus the diameter of the memory wire - they're both the same.  Rookie mistake, it could happen to anyone!  Luckily enough of the beads had a minutely larger hole and I managed to slide them on (i.e. push, shove, beg and plead until they moved).  As luck would have it, because I completely forgot to set it out and measure it first, the pattern of beads I'd chosen fitted exactly (I can only think that whoever watches over us must have taken pity on me).

As you might imagine, by this stage I was feeling fairly pleased with myself, even if I had sore arm muscles from the pushing and shoving - and the bracelet was looking great too.  Just had to pop the crimp bead and connector end back on and a new bracelet would be looking for a loving new home.

These things should have come with instructions!  No one mentioned that the connector should be on before the crimp bead.  And no, it didn't occur to me to look how the stupid thing went together as I pulled it apart - it was a simple connector with a simple crimp bead.  Why is it called memory wire if it can't remember how it goes together?

By the time I'd managed to pull the whole thing apart again and start over the end of the wire was sort of daggy and needed to be chopped off. And no, it didn't enter my head that if I chopped off a couple of millimetres of daggy end that my lovely pattern of beads wouldn't fit anymore and would be completely lopsided and wrong.

How my new bracelet really looks!

And no, I didn't think about how hard that crimp bead would be to get off a second time, when I put it on anyway, because I thought it wouldn't be noticeable that the pattern was lopsided and wrong.

The positive side to all of this was that I discovered my artistic temperament and invented a new swear word. I tried the new word out on the memory wire, while I was trying to work out what to do, but it didn't seem all that impressed (there's a distinct possibility it had heard it before).  I guess I just chalk it up to experience and start with a new bracelet.

And that's as far as I've made it.  The new bracelet is apparently a smidge thicker and I can't get the beads on it!  Lucky I like shopping - I need to buy new beads.

But as I write this, I can feel the lopsided and wrong bracelet looking at me from the bench - sort of like it remembers something unpleasant and might just get it into its little memory wire head to come alive, find an axe and visit me in the middle of the night.

I'm thinking elastic may be the perfect medium for me next.

And the Winner Is...The Duck

Well, it's been quite some time between blogs. What with one thing and another - winding up the first MinzBeadz end of financial year, still trying to master Facebook, going to markets, re-jigging the website, and generally running around like a lunatic with no time to scratch -  let's just say I've been busy!

So what have a learned during my first year (or part thereof) in business for myself, you might ask? (And even if you didn't - bad luck, because I'm going to share some of my fascinating insights).

Like me back or else!

• I've learned that Facebook is neither a book nor do you see people face to face. And just today I learned that there are some really peculiar people (and I use the term 'people' loosely) who want you to like their page - apparently an extremely clever dog has now liked mine and wants a return like. Dream on dog, dream on.  

• I've learned - a little anyway - how to talk about my business without feeling like I'm that excruciatingly boring person that everyone avoids at all costs. I count myself lucky that most people don't feel that way, or are way more polite than I give them credit for and don't show it. (Thank you to those polite and well brought up people).                                                                 
• I've gained a better understanding of what my "unique selling point" is, and might become, in having found a little niche area for MinzBeadz - sourcing jewellery for people, which has enabled me to help, and get to know a little, some really lovely people in the past months.

• I've learned that getting people to take 30 seconds to look at your website can be likened to  pushing the proverbial "stuff" uphill - and I can't think of any reason other than laziness! (Oh, just thought of one - they might be the polite people who I've bored, so I take back the lazy comment for those people).

Freebie 0 VS Duck 95

• I've learned that, despite the number of articles I've read on what makes a Facebook page engaging, following the formula can work really well one day and not at all the next!  And that it can be excruciatingly difficult some days to even give away something for nothing, to the point you think you're the only person left in the world (or the world of Facebook, which some may think is the whole world, but us older and wiser folk know there's more out there), and 3 seconds later 95 people hit the like button for a photo of a duck. Isn't it great that we're not alone and the duck likers are still watching us... I really feel comforted knowing that.

A lot of what I've learned in the last few months relates to people - myself and others - and how they behave.  Of course I always behave wonderfully, but there's some really, um... (trying to think of a word that isn't a swear word), um....well shit, there's some real bitches out there!  And we won't dwell on them because in the end, karma will take care of them. It always does.

Another really important thing I've learned is that Zen Cart (the shopping cart software on my website) does not induce a zen like state and would be more aptly named Wonky Wheel.  Wonky Wheel was written by someone cleverish, and then tested by someone cleverish, then they patted themselves on their mutual cleverish backs and gave it out to innocent bystanders for free. Just to laugh their cleverish laughs at our attempts to understand what they mean with their software.

It is impossible to believe that they gave Wonky Wheel to the average person, asked them to use their help file, then paid attention to any feedback. 

Yesterday I discovered that there does not appear to be a way to have a screaming red sign jump out at you if you haven't chosen a shipping option! I mean really...are you joking??  The default "choose your shipping area" option, which I can't seem to shift from being the default, just bypasses charging any postage costs if you don't go in and select your country. What's with that?

Consequently, we now have one very happy customer who was charged no postage, and international customers will have to email and request a postage fee and be invoiced separately. So much for fully automated and saving me time and energy.  So if anyone is a Wonky Wheel expert, it would be wonderful to hear if it's actually possible to have a loud red sign that waves a flag, saying something along the lines of 'YOU HAVEN'T CHOSEN A SHIPPING METHOD YOU DODO, WHAT DO YOU THINK THAT ENTIRE PAGE WAS ABOUT".

And having just passed the end of the financial year, I've remembered how horrible finalising all the accounts is. Stupidly enough, I'm struggling more with the formula for my stock spreadsheet for the new year. Every night, right before I slip into sleep, I have the formula worked out, then in the morning it's totally vanished and I sit staring stupidly at an Excel page. What's worse is that I know it's just a simple formula. I'm taking the position that once the books are finalised and I have time to stop running around like the aforementioned itchy lunatic, that it will just come to me in daylight.

I know, I live in dreamland...but it's my dreamland and I like it here. The natives are friendly and I'm the Queen. 

Stolen: Floor - REWARD offered for information

Attention everyone, my office floor has been stolen!  It was last seen 2 weeks ago under my desk, filing cabinet and feet.  A reward is being offered for information as to its whereabouts.

Let me take you back to the last time I saw my floor, and the circumstances leading to its disappearance.

*Six months to two weeks ago:

Starting and growing a service based business is somewhat different in space requirements to that of a product based business.

You need a desk, a computer and printer, and a file cabinet (until the business grows and woo hoo a second one is required). Then the stuff that goes on the desk - noddy head toy, stress balls, large doodle pad (lots of doodling time in the early days) - and of course pens in all the colours of the rainbow (if one is going to doodle, then one's doodles should be attractive) along with paper clips (for chain making) and so on.

A paperclip chain is a must have in any decent office environment

You might also require a car - however I don't park mine in my office so I'm not including that.

When you have products to sell, you need all of the above - and then you need the storage space for for your lovely products.  Day one of the whole new life is easy - there's no stock at that point, so the office (which like many home based businesses starts on the kitchen table) is quite spacious.  You look around at your new work environment, nod a little in time to the noddy toy whilst thinking "damn fine office...and so neat - and hey, I've got a floor".

By the time 6 months has rolled around it's a whole different story.  You can no longer work from the table because the rest of the inconsiderate people in the house actually want to eat their meals there without balancing plates and cups on piles of beads.  I think it makes meal times a little bit more fun playing 'catch the crockery' as it rolls along.  Apparently though, I am the only one who has a sense of humour here.

And so us home based people are banished to the back bedroom.

But in the meantime, while we were having fun at the dinner table/office, the gremlins have been destroying our workspace. Where's all my space gone?  And while we're looking for things, where the hell's my desk?  Who dumped all that stuff on it?  If I only had a dog these days I could turn around and glare at him or her in an accusing fashion.  But I haven't, so I had to glare at the Other Half instead (it was almost as good, except I don't remember my dog ever talking back like that...).

Clearly a storage system was required for all the different types of beads and charms, then a separate area for the made up jewellery.  So far so good.  Then I packed everything to go to a market - still following a sort of system, still good.  Then when the market finished the people who were running it wanted to get to the pub for lunch, and literally threw everyone and their goodies out of the door to lock up.  Not good at all, and my system started to get a few cracks around the edges.

Meanwhile, MinzBeadz was growing slowly but surely, and the amount of stock, logically, was increasing too.  So more storage, more sorting, more stacking, more labeling - ahh, nicely under control again.

And then The Son came home.

*Present day

So, his former bedroom, which housed the mess of my Other Half (his is mess, mine is work - let's make that clear), had to be relocated in MY office!  Crowded you ask? Apparently only on my side of the room (I have to take his word for it as I can't actually see over the top of the piles of his mess).  Periodically a paper plane flies across to me with a note that tells me how he's stretched out and comfortable over there and doesn't understand how I can be so disorganised.

My other half also puts earphones in and listens to his really bad music.  At first glance this is a considerate thing to do, however random extremely loud taps of the workboots (presumably to the music), coupled with earphone deafness shouts, of a word here and a word there, do not make for a great experience.  More like losing a few years off your life with fright every time one or the other occurs.

And the son seems quite comfortable in his old room, which magically has more space than when he lived in caveman fashion there before (primarily because we had the bulldozer through after he moved out).

NB: To be fair to said son, the move home is a temporary after an operation whilst needing some TLC, so not entirely his fault.  Alright - not his fault at all (why must you be so pendantic?).  I just don't see why he can't play at being the princess and the pea and have a few beads under the mattress - didn't he sleep enough during his operation?  And from ages 13 to 18?

Anyhow, back to the story - in order to actually do some work in the day, access to the computer and desk is required. So I did a major tidy up (no mean feat given the three square centimetres I now have to move around in).  I also thought that perhaps I might like to join a circus - I seem to have accomplished a fairly impressive balancing act of things on top of things... on top of things.

The good news is, I found my desk, diary, computer and pretty coloured pens and paper clip chain (I was a tad worried about the chain, it took quite some time to get it to that length).  But the bad news - when I stopped being impressed by finding my desk I discovered that my floor was missing.

Theft is the only logical answer and, to whoever took it, I'd like it back NOW please.